PARENT SPOTLIGHT
SYDNEY STOYAN
SMALL MOMENTS OF JOY
BY LAUREN ALPERN
In dark times, it’s important to find light, and share it. And that’s just what Georgian Parents Guild President Sydney Stoyan has focused on doing for the RSGC community over the past year. Whether it’s in her uplifting quotes, her lyrical prose or the creative events she and her team have managed to put together, Sydney has found many ways to connect RSGC families and bring joy and laughter to the Guild during the COVID-19 pandemic. Adair Roberts, Guild Treasurer and parent to Duncan, Class of 2023, and James, Class of 2024, is really impressed by how well this year has gone from a Guild perspective. She attributes that to Sydney. “Under Amanda’s leadership last year, the Guild refined its mission, highlighting ‘connection’ as one of its main goals. Sydney’s entire persona is about fostering connection,” said Adair, who describes Sydney as warm, joyful and brilliant. “She has been able to hold events that are engaging and welcoming. There have been quite a large number of first-time Georgian parents participating, and more parents are attending meetings than ever before.” Adair, who went to St. Clement’s with Sydney many moons ago and couldn’t be happier to reconnect personally and professionally with her long-lost friend, thinks Sydney is perfectly suited for the challenging task of connecting the community. “She’s particularly well-suited to have managed this,” said Adair. “You need somebody who cares about connections, small moments of joy and creating light for people, and that’s what she does in normal times.
“I remember Sydney saying she didn’t want to be the pandemic president,” said Adair. “She really worried about how it was going to go and what we were going to be able to do, but she is probably the best person to have had in the role during COVID because of who she is, her style and what she brings.” Sydney recalls her initial discomfort when the reality of the challenge before her sank in. “When it became clear that COVID wasn’t going to be a two-week event, I remember phoning my sister and saying that I couldn’t do this. Whatever skill set I have is best in person. I was extremely stressed, thinking I couldn’t pull this off,” said Sydney, who recalled going to her first Guild meeting in 2015. “I had imagined myself standing in beautiful Ketchum Hall and taking a moment to read the quotations etched on the ceiling like I do every time I’m there. I thought this was going to be my chance to have special times with special people and now it would be a real loss.” But while the loss of in-person contact is poignant and tangible, Sydney and her team have managed to find ways to make up for it. They have run numerous successful events, including arts nights, wine and cheese evenings, book clubs, kitchen parties and Guild meetings via Zoom that have had more people in attendance than ever before. Whether it was the decision to alternate between morning and evening meetings or the fact that parents don’t have to leave their homes to join, there hasn’t seemed to be any Zoom fatigue. Quite the opposite, in fact.
“Zoom has brought in folks that have been around for a while, but haven’t joined in before,” said Sydney, whose sons Jacob and Gabriel are in the Classes of 2021 and 2024 respectively. “That’s been really heartening and has opened my eyes to the opportunities to really connect with people going forward. I think maybe our community is a bit more varied. Parents aren’t travelling anymore. We’ve had more dads than ever join meetings and even form committees. It’s so nice to see.” As she navigated the early hurdles of organizing and facilitating Zoom meetings, Sydney learned more about herself and grew increasingly more confident. Especially as she found her connections with people getting stronger than ever. “I think I have met more people online than I have in real life. I’ve had more texts and conversations than before, which has been enlightening, and I’ve had more time with my sons. My husband used to travel loads and now he’s home and not missing family meals. With all of the other losses, that has been a blessing,” said Sydney. “I’ve learned that when something goes wrong, you can repair the damage. It’s important to take deep breaths. My kids have a great sense of humour and just when I think I’m losing the plot, someone makes a dry little remark and order is restored.”
Sydney has even been able to restore some order into Zoom meetings gone wrong as she eases into things on the technology side. “The technology part has really scared me, but I think I’ve come some way—not a long way,” said Sydney. “Believe it or not, I’m a shy person and I’m really introverted, but I’ve learned to throw myself into the silence if I can and I’m trying to learn how to blush off the awkwardness.” Jacob Buchan, who has held the role of Head Prefect at the same time his mother sits at the helm of the Guild, has been a huge support for his mother, both in terms of technological support and simply watching how he chairs committees. The duo should have read together at the Carol Service, which would have been a great honour for both of them. While not being able to do that was a big loss, they have still been able to bond over some of their common experiences this year. “We speak about our respective RSGC roles on a daily basis, so it gets folded into everyday conversation and the goings-on in our house,” said Jacob, who describes his mother as kind, loving, caring, brilliant, articulate and committed. “Despite there not being any overlap between Guild and Prefect stuff, we’ve both gotten used to the early morning wake-ups to get in that last-minute writing and reflecting on what’s been going on. It’s become a regular part of our life this year. In many ways, it has been a bonding experience.”